Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Most men these days are struggling in both the dating world and their relationships because there are so many misconceptions about what the ladies truly find attractive. And a lot of guys these days are frustrated and giving up on dating and relationships completely. And here's what they don't understand. It's actually their fault that they can't attract women or hold down relationships. And it's not because they're unattractive or that women are evil. It's because they are misinformed, misled and following bad advice and their own false beliefs. If it's your first time here, my My name is Michael Riggs. I'm a full time author, entrepreneur, men's personal development and marriage mentor, husband and father of six. And I teach men all over the world how to live fully optimized, leveled up lives. So if that's something you're into, definitely stick around. Subscribe to this podcast, subscribe to the channel because that's what we do here every week. Inspire men all over the world and teach them how to live fully optimized, leveled up lives. And today I'm unlocking the truth about what women truly find attractive and how to level up your love life like never before.
Stick around. Hello and welcome to the Warrior Kings podcast. I'm your host, Michael Riggs, here to assist you on your journey to living a fully optimized, leveled up life as a man. So again, welcome and welcome back to the podcast. It's great to be here today, it's great to talk to you today. And yeah man, I'm excited about this one. Even though I'm a married man these days, this is a subject that I'm very passionate about. Especially these days, seeing so many young men struggle in the dating world, in the relationship world, a lot of them giving up on dating and relationships completely and giving up on marriage. Especially in if you've been here for a while, you know that I'm a strong believer in marriage, so it all just seems to be going the wrong way. But hopefully I can inspire you guys and give you some hope today and unlock some of the truth and crush some of the limiting beliefs and misconceptions around what women actually find attractive. That's my goal today. So without further ado, let's dive right into the episode. I did two surveys recently on social media where I asked women what they find attractive and today I want to go through those comments with you really quick. And the first question was, what do you find attractive about a guy on a first impression basis? Like when you first meet a guy or when you first see a guy, what signals to you that this is a hot guy? That's the question that I asked, and these were the answers that I got in the comments. All right, first, we have manners and smile. So manners, I'm guessing she means is polite, treats people well. And again, this is on a first impression basis. So she wants a guy to have a nice smile and she wants him to be polite and treat people well. Next comment. Soft, kind eyes and smile. So very similar to the last one. The. The kind eyes and the smile signal that the guy isn't a weirdo or a psycho, right? He has a good vibe. He has a good energy around him. And what a lot of guys don't understand is that our eyes and our face expressions and our body language and all that communicates way more than just physical appearance. Like you're communicating through your eyes. Do you have kind eyes? Do you have a kind smile? She goes on to say, makes me feel comfortable with his energy. And then she says kindness to me and others. So very similar to the last comment. Manners and smile. It's kind of a written version of that, but it's soft, kind eyes and smile. Makes me feel comfortable with his energy, kindness to me and others.
[00:03:17] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:03:18] Speaker A: He looks clean and put together. Nice smile again and a good sense of humor. So let me ask you guys, have you ever considered if you have a nice smile before and how much that's communicating? Because apparently it's a really common one. I never put a whole lot of thought into my smile before, but this kind of opened my eyes to that.
[00:03:34] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:03:35] Speaker A: Again, smile. Smell how he treats others on our first date. So again, manners and smile. Apparently smile is really important, guys.
[00:03:44] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:03:45] Speaker A: Character and integrity. That's a good one.
[00:03:48] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:03:48] Speaker A: Making sure he has all of his teeth first and foremost. This one kind of made me laugh a little bit because I'm like, well, who are you dating that you got to make sure that they have all their teeth, you know what I mean? Without just assuming that they have teeth, you know, I'm not sure what circle she's dating in, but making sure he has all of his teeth first and foremost.
[00:04:05] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:04:06] Speaker A: Eye contact and how they carry themselves really, really huge. One eye contact. I mean, if you're awkward, you're looking around, you're looking down, you can't make ey contact because you feel so awkward. Women pick up on that right away. They pick up on your vibe, your energy, and like I said, your eyes and your face Are communicating more than just what they look like. They're communicating what's going on on the inside. How they carry themselves is confidence, magnetism, right?
[00:04:31] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:04:32] Speaker A: Manners and eye contact. Again with the manners. And you know, I like to put manners on my sandwich. A bad joke. Sorry. Manners and eye contact. So much like manners and smile, though. Basically what most of these women are saying is that there is so much communicated with a guy's.
[00:04:47] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:04:47] Speaker A: Eye contact and confidence.
[00:04:50] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:04:50] Speaker A: Having a sense of humor. Another comment says smile and laugh. Then eyes again. Smile and eyes. Clean and smells good. Hygiene, cologne. Smile and the way he presents himself verbally. No slang. I'm just plowing through comments now.
[00:05:06] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:05:06] Speaker A: His character. And the next one. If he's polite to service workers. I think a couple ladies had mentioned that so far is just. Yeah, that goes into the manners thing and the politeness thing, right? Does he treat people well? That's a big one. Another comment Saying manners. Another one saying sense of humor and kind eyes. Like I said, communicating through the eyes. Do you have asshole eyes or do you have kind eyes? Apparently a big deal.
[00:05:29] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:05:30] Speaker A: Genuine smile. We're back to smile again.
[00:05:32] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:05:33] Speaker A: His facial looks. Another one. If they can make good eye contact, not in a creepy way, but confident, that's another thing. Some eye contact is creepy, some eye contact is confidence. Comment from Lori says smile and teeth are not optional. So again, apparently a lot of guys don't have teeth. I didn't know that before. Or maybe these are senior citizens or something. I don't know. But like they're like when these women are meeting guys, they're definitely checking to make sure he has teeth in his mouth.
[00:06:01] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:06:01] Speaker A: Eyes. I love those squinty cowboy eyes. And this one felt a little bit personal and a little bit awkward. And then the last comment that I got is mouth. Just mouth. She just said mouth. She's probably looking for teeth too. I don't know. And the second question I asked on social media was, what is the one non negotiable trait that a guy has to have, the one trait that you can't compromise on? And these are the answers that I got for that. This is basically like if a lady is going into a relationship with a guy or dating a guy or considering a relationship with him, what is that one non negotiable thing that she can't live without? And these are the answers. First comment. He has to love. The Lord must be a man of faith. If he has that, everything else will fall in line.
[00:06:43] Speaker B: Next Comment.
[00:06:44] Speaker A: I have my together. He should too. I already raised my kids. Okay, well, have your together. You heard her. Kindness is the.
[00:06:52] Speaker B: Next comment. Next comment.
[00:06:53] Speaker A: Respect.
Be a Christian. Be kind and honest. Another comment says honesty. So honesty is really, really important here. That's a really common one. And also loving the Lord. I can agree with that one. Character. A lot of other things fall behind character. We've seen character a lot so far. Sense of humor and kind. Kindness. There is an emphasis on kindness throughout this entire experience we're having here. Sense of humor again. Can't take things so seriously with a sense of humor. So that's two sense of humor comments there in a row.
[00:07:24] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:07:25] Speaker A: Puts God.
Next one. He allows me to have my own opinion. You should allow your lady to have her own opinion. I don't know who's not doing that, but if you don't allow your lady to have an opinion, you're probably an.
[00:07:37] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:07:38] Speaker A: Hard worker.
[00:07:39] Speaker B: Next one.
[00:07:39] Speaker A: Resilience.
[00:07:40] Speaker B: Next one.
[00:07:41] Speaker A: A manly man who is strong but kind, independent and works hard, but always has time for the ones he loves. There was a lot of grammar issues on that one, but I kind of. I sorted it out for you. I sorted it out and I made it make sense. All right.
[00:07:55] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:07:56] Speaker A: Kindness again.
[00:07:57] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:07:57] Speaker A: Full time employment.
[00:08:00] Speaker B: Next one.
[00:08:00] Speaker A: Makes me laugh. Loves the Lord. And sense of humor again.
[00:08:04] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:08:05] Speaker A: He not only has to love the Lord, but actually follow him by obeying his word, which produces the fruit of the spirit.
[00:08:11] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:08:12] Speaker A: A real man with a laughing face.
[00:08:14] Speaker B: Next comment.
[00:08:15] Speaker A: Why is this on my for you page? I don't know, buddy. Maybe you needed to see some of the comments and get some insight about what women find attractive. Maybe you were brought here for a reason. Velocity is the screen name of this guy. And then the last comment on this one was 100% guy with no female traits. And so we saw a lot of patterns here, did we not? And that was a lot of fun and gave me a lot of insight to share with you. That was really entertaining to do. But there are some key things that actually make a man attractive and I wanted to share some of those with you today. And the first is having a sense of purpose. And if you've been here for a while, you've heard me talk about that. Busy equals value. And yeah, busy equals value to women. If you're available all the time, if you have nothing going on for you, if you aren't going anywhere and in life that will be extremely unattractive to women, you have to have dreams and goals and ambitions. You have to be going somewhere in life. When I first started seeing my now wife, I was working, doing construction for a custom home builder. And at the time I was actually very successful in my dating life. And one of the reasons for that and one of the reasons that she fell in love with me, hopefully for many reasons, but one of them I believe is that I had drive and ambition. I didn't say I'm doing construction forever. I said I have a lot going for me. I'm going to write books, I'm going to start a media company. This where I'm going and you can either come with me or not. And I painted a picture for her of a life of adventure and abundance. You know, I wasn't a dead end. I said, this is where I'm going. So you have to have drive and ambition and be going somewhere in life. When you talk to a lady and she says, what do you do? And you say, I work at Starbucks. And she says, well, what are your plans for the future? You say, oh, I'm going to school, not going to work, man. You have to have clear direction, clear purpose, and actually be going somewhere in life. One of the comments that I get from guys a lot is that all women want is money. So just have a lot of money and boom. But that's not entirely true. And sure there are some ladies out there that are just out to get money. I'm not saying that doesn't exist, but more times than not, that's just a misinterpretation of the woman's innate drive to desire a strong protector and provider. And women don't want dead ends. If you think that you should be able to be a broke loser and still attract women, I'm sorry, but you're wrong and someone lied to you. But that doesn't mean that you need to be a millionaire right now. You just have to make it clear that you are going somewhere and you have to actually be going somewhere. Find your calling, find your purpose and pursue it relentlessly. Then it doesn't matter what stage of life you're in, it is clear that there is a future of adventure and abundance on the horizon. And women love that. And another thing that I want to talk about today is the balance between the warrior and the lover. Like many of the women in those comments said, they like a guy who is kind, kind to others, has kindness, the kindness trait, has kind eyes, has a kind smile mouth. But I can guarantee you that what they are saying is not they want a guy who Looks and sounds like a wuss. That has nothing to with kindness. There is a balance between the warrior and the lover. If you look like you can break someone in half, that means you have the trait of the protector. And if you are kind, there is a contrast there. And she knows that she's safe. She knows that you can protect her and that she's safe because you're kind. And that is the balance between the warrior and the lover. Being a strong protector and having the ability to protect her doesn't mean being an. You can still be a nice, kind guy and still be a badass. It's absolutely possible. And that's where a lot of guys go wrong, is they think, oh, she wants a strong, manly man, I gotta act like an and that's absolutely not true. If you have kindness and if you're a badass, that is the perfect balance. Women find that extremely attractive. The next thing that I want to talk about today is smelling good. A lot of women say that they like a guy to smell good and I have experienced that myself in my own life. I have worn cologne for many, many years and it has always worked out for me. Even in my marriage with my beautiful wife. I make sure that I smell good every day. And I just want to tell you, man, you don't have to spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on fragrances to good. There are budget fragrances or at least inexpensive fragrances that smell very expensive. And my favorites are by a company called Rasasi, based out of Dubai, I believe. And my two favorite fragrances are. And by the way, this isn't sponsored. I'm just a fan. Like this is what I wear myself. Literally not sponsored. I'm just sharing this with you today to help you out. The first of my favorite fragrances from them is. And please don't slaughter me for mispronouncing these names because I have no idea how they're actually pronounced. But the first is Doreg I I think it's D A A R E G. This is a very masculine and manly scent and you can get this bottle for under $20, dude. And this stuff smells expensive. And also you could say it's from Dubai. So like, how much more fancy could you feel? You know what I'm saying? The second one by Rasasi that I love is Shura. And I know I'm pronouncing that one wrong, but this is more of like a clean, manly, soapy scent. It just makes you smell super clean. Also very complex smelling and very expensive smelling. Both of Those are under $20 a bottle and smelling good is ext.
Talking about attracting women. They really appreciate that, trust me. The next thing that I wanted to talk about today is magnetism and energy. And I kind of mentioned this earlier in the episode, but women pick up on your vibe and your energy and how you present yourself. It's not just what you look like, it's overall how you're presenting yourself. And are you presenting yourself like a awkward weirdo or are you presenting yourself like a confident, secure in self man? Do you bring positive, confident energy or do you bring awkward energy? And I'm sure if you're an awkward guy or if you think you are, which, which that's not true, by the way. That's a story that you're telling yourself if you think that you are an awkward guy. I'm sure that you get that all the time. You recognize that all the time, like, oh, I made her feel weird. Well, guess what, dude, you don't have to do that. You can give a good energy, a confident energy, a positive energy, a kind energy. Use your eyes in your mouth. Like all the ladies were saying in the comments before, that communicates a lot. Eye contact. They said that as well. Lots of eye contact. And not weird eye contact, just confident eye contact. Because you are projecting an energy in your interaction. You're not just in the physical world. I don't know how to explain this. I'm going to find a better way to explain this and then get back to you guys. But basically you are projecting an energy in your interactions. And what it comes down to is are you projecting a secure, calm, safe, confident energy or are you projecting a negative, awkward, weird energy? Because if you are doing that, you know what's the first thing that comes to a woman's mind? Not just aww, he's so shy and awkward. No, it's. What is this guy's motive? He's acting like a weirdo. Why is he so uncomfortable? Is he about to do something? Am I in danger? That's the vibe that they get. You understand what I'm saying? So let's run back through these really quick. We had having a sense of purpose in that busy equals value. Are you going somewhere in life? Do you have ambition? You don't have to be a multimillionaire right now, but is that sometime in the future? Are you painting a picture of adventure and abundance? Do you have drive? Do you have ambition? The second thing that I talked about was the balance between the warrior and the lover. Being a manly man, being a Strong, attractive man isn't about being an asshole. And so many guys in this world, in this life, think that it means being an. It's not. You can be a kind, put together nice guy and still look like a badass and still have the potential to be a badass if you need to protect her or anyone else. It's a balance. Warrior versus lover. And you know what? I think I missed one here on my list. I accidentally checked it off. So I'm just gonna backtrack here for a second. One of the things that I wanted to talk about today was personal hygiene. How well do you groom yourself? Do you trim your nose hair? Do you trim your ear hairs? Do you trim your eyebrows? Do you keep your hair trimmed up? Because it's not all about natural good looks and good genes. Cleaning up makes a massive difference. I mean, for literally anybody. I'm sure you've seen one of those shows. They used to be more popular, but they would take a guy or take a person who was kind of a dumpy loser, clean them up, and then put them back out there looking handsome. And it was like, boom. Whoa. Major transformation. Completely transformed their lives. Like, personal hygiene, actually taking care of yourself, actually cleaning yourself up makes a massive difference no matter who you are or what you think you look like. And if you don't know much about personal hygiene and taking care of yourself, yourself, grooming yourself, cleaning up and stuff like that, or even how to shave or any of these things, there's tons of information out there online, especially on YouTube, where you can learn this stuff. So just start studying that, you know, how does a person with my look look their best? Look into that. Massively important. If the subject that we're talking about is how to attract women. And I saw another video, I believe it was on TikTok where a lady asked one of my least favorite phrases in the world these days is, what's your biggest ick? What's your biggest ick when it comes to guys? Ick. Like my big ick bros. You saying ick? Anyways, lots of the comments were about nose hair, ear hair, mustache, going too far over the lip, things like that, when he doesn't have nice teeth. All like, I would say, like 80% of comments were hygiene and grooming related things that were turning women off when they meet guys. So I just wanted to point out today that that is massively important if you want to be more attractive to women. Personal hygiene and grooming is massively important. So now that I backtracked, let's get Back to just recalling what we talked about here today. The next one smelling good. You can smell good even on a budget. It's not about breaking the bank or spending more money than you should. Like I said, you can find fragrances, and not just those two. You can do research. Like a while back, one of my favorites was called Territor Wild, I think is how it's. Or Terra Trois Wild. Whatever. I'm not good at pronouncing these fragrance names, like I told you, but it smells apparently, exactly like. What is that one called? Dior Sauvage. That's what it was. It's supposed to smell exactly like Dior Sauvage. And so many people said that it does. And I wore that for months, got tons of compliments and there was like a $15 bottle. So just do your research and you can smell really good and really expensive without actually smelling expensive. The next one was magnetism and energy. Are you bringing a positive, confident energy into your interactions or even into a room? Do you make eye contact? That makes sense. What energy are you bringing? Are you bringing a weirdo energy or a confident energy? That's the next thing we talked about because women pick up on energies and vibe.
Just your appearance and yeah, that's the rundown. I have a lot more to say on this subject. So if you got something out of this episode, if this episode opened your eyes or inspired you in any way, definitely let me know in the comments. That way I can talk about this stuff more and teach more of this stuff to you. Because our time is up for today. And that's what I got for you guys today. Thank you so much for watching and listening. Wherever you're getting this, definitely get subscribed on YouTube or on the podcast platforms because like I said at the beginning, this is what we do every week. Just talk about man stuff and how to live a fully optimized, leveled up life as a man. But yeah, man, if you're feeling discouraged in dating in the dating world these days, I don't blame you. It's a lot more confusing than it was back when I was into it. I really feel for you guys, but just know that there is hope. Have confidence, dude, it's not impossible. You're just misinformed. You're taking the wrong advice. The modern advice is wrong. It doesn't hold up. The old advice holds up, trust me. From old guys like me. I mean, I've been very successful in the this stuff. Not to boast or to brag, but I have a beautiful wife I've dated many beautiful women before and I just kind of wanted to share that with you. Like, don't take the wrong advice and have hope. Level up every aspect of your life. Get out there and you will find the woman of your dreams. I promise you. Just keep at it. Don't fear rejection. That's a huge one. Do not fear rejection. Rejection happens. It's going to happen. A lot happens to all of us, and I really, truly believe it. Man, you listening to this right now? If you are who I'm talking to, you are going to find the woman of your dreams and she is going to treat you right. And I have another episode from way back that you can check out called how to know if she's the one or don't get married until you know she's one. Maybe that's two different episodes, but just go check out some of my older work. I talk about all of this stuff and expand on it even more. But yeah, guys, thank you so much for watching and listening today. Get out there, kill it. Level up every aspect of your life. A life of overflowing abundance awaits you on the other side of you deciding to make the switch, make the change, and become everything that you know you can be, everything that you should be, everything that you were always meant to be. I love you. I'm proud of you. And there's a great calling and purpose for your life. And I'll catch you guys on the next one. Thanks, guys. Bye.
