Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hello and welcome to the Warrior Kings podcast. I'm your host, Michael Riggs, here to assist you on your journey to unlocking masculinity, manliness and the warrior spirit within and overall leveling up your life. Yeah, dude, that's how I got addicted to pickle juice. It's like a slippery slope. Oh, we're on right now.
[00:00:16] Speaker B: Hey again, welcome.
[00:00:18] Speaker A: Welcome to the Warrior Kings podcast. It's good to have you here today. I'm feeling a little raspy all of a sudden. I hope that's not coming through in the audio, in my voice and that sort of thing. If you're new here, my name is Michael Riggs. I'm a full time author, artist and entreprene who are husband and father of five. And on the Warrior Kings podcast, I say all of the things that weak men don't want to hear. So if that's not something that you're into, definitely don't subscribe to this podcast. But if it is and you want to level up every aspect of your life as a man, definitely hit that subscribe button. Stick around. Tons of valuable information that I want.
[00:00:49] Speaker B: To impart on you that I have.
[00:00:51] Speaker A: Learned over the years making my own mistakes and now I help men all over the world not make those same mistakes by imparting this wisdom. So again, it's good to have you here today. Today I'm going to be diving into some age old questions that men have. I'm going to answ 10 questions, 10 common questions. And these come from popular Google searches, things that men ask Google all the time. And we're gonna get into it, dude, it's gonna be awesome. So real quick, first I just want to say that me and my wife just finished the show Beef on Netflix. And man, that was the wackiest show I've ever seen. That show gave me more anxiety than Ozark. Just the most bonkers show and it's a 24, so I knew something was coming. The first few episodes, I just didn't know what. I knew it had to be crazy because if you know anything about A24, their movies are crazy. And yeah, few episodes, last couple episodes, absolutely bonkers. But overall pretty entertaining show. Very weird. Let me know if you've seen that one and what you thought about it.
[00:01:44] Speaker B: But yeah, today we're going to be.
[00:01:45] Speaker A: Answering a few questions because there's way too much terrible advice out there on the Internet now. You know, things like short form video. People say just whatever they want and a lot of it is nonsense. So I just Want to give you some clarity on some topics, some subjects, some questions that men have. And also, real quick, I just want to give a shout out to New Zealand and India. I just found out that in New Zealand and India this podcast is pretty big. And that was a surprise to me because I'm here in the United States. But I'm glad you guys are here listening. I hope that I'm helping you level up every aspect of your life. And it's super awesome to hear that that in other places, all around the world, I'm actually reaching people, reaching men, that people are actually receiving this information. I'm pretty sure that in New Zealand we have the number 40 spot for self improvement podcast. Just kind of mind blowing to me. But yeah, super awesome. So thank you listeners in New Zealand and India and everywhere else in the world. Happy to be reaching people with these awesome messages. And a huge thank you to all the gu who are continuing to listen to the how to Be a Better Husband series that I put out on this podcast. It's super awesome to see those numbers on those episodes go up every single day and to know that so many men want to level up their relationships, level up their marriages with their wives to overall better their lives and better every aspect of their lives. So big shout out to those guys watching and listening to the how to Be a Better Husband series on the Warrior Kings podcast. When I started this podcast, I felt that it was a calling. I felt like it was something that I was supposed to be doing. You know, I wrote the book Warrior King and I wanted to expand on that further reach men in other ways. And I was a little reluctant about doing it at first, but I just had this strong call, this strong pull to do it, and I finally stepped out and did it. And I didn't expect for it to be this big, this fast. So thank you guys so much again. Maybe we'll just do a thank you episode where I say thank you in 20 different ways. But you guys are awesome and it's awesome to have you here. So without further ado, let's dive into these 10 questions that I'm going to be answering for you today. And like I said, these questions come from top Google searches, things that men search all the time, common questions that men have. And I got to tell you, I've been seeing so much whining on social media about men shouldn't have to do this, men shouldn't have to do that. There's a whole side of the Internet that's wimps teaching other men how to be wimps and giving terrible advice. And there's also been this debate recently. Should men pay on dates or pay for the first dates or split the check or pay at all? Like, should she pay? Should he pay? Should they split the check? And we're going to be getting into that, too. I'm going to answer that question for you today. And to the guys who keep commenting and saying things like, you didn't mention this one aspect. You missed this one thing. Why did, why didn't you mention this thing? Why didn't you cover this? Go grow some brain cells, bro. It would be impossible for me to cover every single thought that I have about one single topic in one single podcast episode. So in these episodes, I cover what I cover. And we have plenty of time to cover everything. Just stick around and we'll get to it. So these 10 questions, I'm gonna answer as directly as I can. And if you feel that I missed something, I probably missed it because I just didn't mention that aspect of the thing. Right? That doesn't mean that I don't consider it or think about it at all, or that I'm ignorant in some way aspect of what I'm talking about. All right, let's go. Question one. Should men lead in a relationship? Absolutely. But there's this misunderstanding about what leading means, and both men and women misunderstand what that means a lot of times. In the same ways, leading doesn't mean that the man is the boss and he has to be demanding and mean. A man leading in a relationship or in a marriage means that he has clear direction and clear decision making skills. And it also means that he handles the business of life so his woman doesn't even have to worry about it. A man who is leading his lady and leading his household has a clear vision for the future and knows where he's going. And he makes all of the hard decisions so he can ensure the success of his family, his relationship, and his future. So, for example, the misunderstood style of a man leading, like if a woman had a suggestion in a decision making conversation, the man would say, no, I'm the leader in this relationship, so you be quiet. When in true leading, the man would say something more along the lines of, that's a really good idea, but I just think that this is the best decision to make right now. Being the leader of your relationship in your household and being abusive are two extremely different things. But some people think that they're the exact same thing. They mistake them for being the same thing. True leading is so subtle, she wouldn't even know that it's happening. But trust me, she would appreciate it. Question two, Should a man provide? Yes, a man should provide. The fact that that's even a question is crazy to me. And not only because you should, but it's also our innate nature as men to hunt and provide. And if you're not the main provider or sole provider in your household right now, that's okay. But it should absolute be your goal to do that someday. You should definitely be moving in that direction. Have a dream, have a vision, have some ambition, have a vision for your future success and then pursue that thing relentlessly. And some of you are saying, my wife loves to work and that's super awesome, man. But imagine if her working was a choice and not because she had to to make the bills. If you've been here for a while, you've heard me talk about this before, but hundreds or even thousands of years ago, you would have had to hunt and provide for your family. You would have had to fight off invaders to your village. If you didn't, everybody that you know and love, your family, everybody would not have survived. You would have had to have been a strong protector and provider for your family to survive. Just because the way that we live is so comfortable now and so safe, and because we have the choice not to do the hard things, it doesn't mean that it's not our nature as men to be strong protectors, providers, and hunters. Yes, men should provide. Men should be protectors and providers. Absolutely. Question three, should men be stoic? I think you should be yourself, man, but just don't be a wuss. But if we're talking about stoicism, I think that there's infinite wisdom in the teachings of the stoics, and I would encourage you to dive into them, especially Marcus Aurelius. That's my personal favorite. Question four, should men be feminist? No. Question five, should men be vulnerable? Complex question. If we're talking about being vulnerable emotionally, I think that the answer to that question is yes and no. I certainly think that men should have wisdom with how they react to emotions and circumstances that they face in life. And I think they should have a thick skin, for sure. I don't think that men should be emotionally reckless or overly emotional. And I don't think that they should be emotionally emotionally vulnerable on the level that anyone or anything can pierce their unarmored psyche. But I do believe that men should have the ability to be emotionally vulnerable. And take note of the fact that I said the ability to be emotionally vulnerable. I think that completely quenching that could turn you into an real quick. And this ability can come in handy too, especially in our relationships with women. Activating that ability at the right times can be hugely beneficial. When a woman wants to know that we really care. But if you're an emotional wreck all the time and if you're emotionally vulnerable, all there can be massive negative consequences for that. Which is why I prefer to say that men should have the ability to be emotionally vulnerable, not just simply emotionally vulnerable. Right. Having the ability to be emotionally vulnerable can also come in handy when you need to reach out to a friend or open up to a friend about something that you're going through. When many men are afraid to open up to another man or to a friend about how they're feeling because they feel that they will be judged for being emotionally vulnerable, so many men stay silent when they're going through something. I think that it would be hugely beneficial to us as men to understand that there is a time and a place to do that and we can be accepting of each other in those times where we open up and we're emotionally vulnerable with each other without thinking that it's weakness. Still, knowing that that man is strong, he just needs to open up in that moment. It gets hard sometimes, man. It really does. And that's okay. We all go through some stuff now. Should a man be vulnerable in any other aspect of his life? No. Men should be strong. They should be unshakable. They should be unmovable. Question 6. Should a man change for a woman? I really think this comes down to honest with yourself and answering the question, am I an and if the answer is yes, then yes, you should change. Especially if you want her in your life. Does a woman want a man with unhealthy vices and habits, self destructive behaviors, lazy and apathetic, who's a dead end, Or a man with ambition and drive who's going somewhere in life and loves her and respects her and will take care of her. If you want to be freebird, go be freebird, dude. But if you want a good woman in your life, you probably have some things that you need to change. Some things that you need to shed away, Some old ways that you need to put in the past. You need to die to the old self and become the new self. The leveled up, super awesome version of you. Question 7. Should men initiate dates? Listen man, women love adventure and they want to get swept away in it. If you've been here with me for a while, you Know that I love the quote from Wild at Heart by John Eldridge that says women don't want to be the adventure. They want to be caught up in something much greater than themselves. It's one of my favorite quotes of all time and a super amazing book. If you haven't read Wild at Heart, I don't even know John Eldridge. I'm not associated with him or his book in any way. I just you to know that that is an amazing book. Especially if you're seeking what it means to be a man and how to level up your life as a man and understand what it means to be a man, that sort of thing. Great book. Wild at Heart by John Eldridge. Check it out. But for example, think about the difference between saying, I don't know, what do you think we should do? Or saying, I have the greatest night of your life planned. I'll pick you up at 7.
[00:10:58] Speaker B: Wear a dress.
[00:10:59] Speaker A: Also, if this is a question that you really have and you're waiting for women to ask you out on dates, you'll probably be waiting forever just to be honest with you. And this goes back to leading as well. Shouldn't just initiate dates, they should initiate everything respectfully, of course, especially if you want her to respect you as a man from the very beginning. She wants to know that you have clear direction, you know where you're going, and she wants to know that she can trust that direction. She will know that if you have clear direction for the little things, that you will have clear direction for the bigger things and that you will lead her into the future that she deserves. Question 8 Should men always plan dates? Yes, of course. Unless she does. If she has an idea and somewhere that she really wants to go, take that and make a plan around it once again. Again, showing your leadership and clear direction. And if she plans a date, that's cool, man. Go have fun. There's nothing wrong with that. Question 9 should a man be romantic? Again, I think you should be yourself, man. But I will say that you being romantic or having the ability to be romantic would be hugely beneficial to your relationship or your marriage and to the longevity of that relationship. If the question do women like romance? Is a mystery to you, I don't know what to do with you, son. Romance novels and Hallmark movies are booming industries for a reason. But like I said, be yourself. If you don't think that you're a super romantic guy, lean into that sometimes. Explore that. Try it out. And if you're a super romantic guy, maybe tone it down a little.
[00:12:21] Speaker B: Bit.
[00:12:22] Speaker A: There's a balance. But in the right balance, women love romance. It's the difference between the average boring man and the suave, mysterious, intriguing, handsome man who can whisk her away to Loveland. It's the difference between banging and intentional lovemaking. So should men be romantic? Men should have the ability to be romantic, for sure. And now the tenth and final question. Should men pay for dates? And I will answer that question right after this really quick spiel. Thank you, guys. Stick around. Hey, dudes. Just cutting in here for a quick second. If you didn't know, this podcast is sort of an expansion to my book, Warrior King. Unlocking Masculinity, Manliness, and the warrior spirit within. This book is all about what it means to be a man. The confusion around modern masculinity, what is our place as men in this modern world. It gets really confusing, right? For me, personally, I didn't begin exploring that question until I was 30 years old. And I had already lived as a nightmare in my life all the way up until that point, until my life fell ap and I realized that I needed to learn how to be a man, how to be a good man, what that means. And after embarking on that journey myself and doing all of the research, leveling up every aspect of my life, marrying the woman of my dreams, suddenly living my dream life, I wrote this book. And in this book are seven levels to teach you how to level up every aspect of your life. Or at least begin to. It's my belief from my personal experience that this is the perfect starting point. Everything that I learned on my own journey of self discovery, I put into this one book. The seven levels are the primal, the listener, the wise man, the lover, the protector, warrior, and the king. And through these seven levels, you will learn so much about how to be a super awesome guy. It's available right now in ebook, paperback, and audiobook. So if that's your thing, hey, definitely check it out. All right. Welcome back from the spiel. So, should men pay for dates? What do you want her to be your mommy? Gosh, spoiled brass these days. I swear, that's like asking, am I a man? Yes, men should pay for dates. Not just because traditionally that's how it's always been done, but also because you're not a ninny. I can't even imagine going on a date with a beautiful woman and then at the and being like, should we split the chick? You might as well say, I'm a little with no integrity. And it was lovely to spend this one evening with you going back to men being strong protectors and providers and a woman's innate desire for that. You're basically saying, I won't provide for you right now, so I probably never will. These people online saying that she should have to pay too, are so lost, I don't even know where to begin. Her paying or you both splitting the check means that she's your friend, not a potential lover. You paying means that you are a strong protector and provider and you will lead her into a future of adventure and abundance. And if you you can't pay, you're not ready to be dating in the first place. And that's all I have to say about that. Forrest Gump yes, men should pay for dates.
[00:15:01] Speaker B: So what do questions like this come down to?
[00:15:03] Speaker A: I believe that they're signs of how.
[00:15:05] Speaker B: Lost and confused as men we are these days.
[00:15:07] Speaker A: And it's not just the men. I think that in a lot of.
[00:15:10] Speaker B: Ways, ladies are just as confused too. But as far as men and young men, we just simply aren't taught these things anymore. There is no mentorship for most young men. There is no initiation into manhood. And if you have questions like these.
[00:15:22] Speaker A: If you ask these sorts of questions.
[00:15:24] Speaker B: Just ask your what would a strong, honorable man do? What would a warrior king do? If the question is, should a man provide? And you come to the conclusion no, because he just shouldn't have to, you're lost. The dating landscape for young men these days is perilous terrain and for so many reasons. But after doing this research, after researching these questions that men have, I've realized that it's much worse than I thought.
[00:15:48] Speaker A: On a lot of levels.
[00:15:49] Speaker B: One could say, well, it's no wonder men can't find dates or find girlfriends anymore these days. They don't even know the first thing.
[00:15:55] Speaker A: About how to treat a good woman.
[00:15:57] Speaker B: Woman. And I don't blame them. I didn't either. I had no idea either until I dove in and started learning these things. And like I said before, I didn't start learning these things until after I was 30 years old. And when it comes to the more traditional ways, the more traditional ways of dating, relationships, marriage, all of that sort.
[00:16:13] Speaker A: Of stuff, if your viewpoint is it's.
[00:16:15] Speaker B: Just different now, we just don't do things like that anymore, then I don't know, dude, just be single forever, have many, many terrible relationships. I don't know what to tell you. I truly believe that the more we move back towards more traditional ways of dating, relationship relationships and marriage, the more we will begin to thrive in those areas.
[00:16:32] Speaker A: Because I don't know if you've noticed.
[00:16:33] Speaker B: But it used to work and now it doesn't.
[00:16:35] Speaker A: The old ways were working.
[00:16:37] Speaker B: The new ways are not working. These new ideologies just simply are not working. Why should men lead in their relationships and in their households? Because they're men. Why should men pay on dates? Why should men have to pay for the date? Because they're men. Men are protectors and providers. It's just who we are and what we are by design. As a witness regularly to female conversations, one of the main themes, one of the most comm themes in breakups is that the guy was such a child. As they say, they talk a lot about how guys don't handle anything and how they have to handle everything for them like they're their mommy. They also talk about how guys have no ambition or any sort of drive to do anything at all. And that's one of the reasons that this work is so important to me, why I am doing this work, why I have set out on this mission to teach men how to be men, or what that even means, to level.
[00:17:25] Speaker A: Up every aspect of the their lives.
[00:17:27] Speaker B: To learn how to be strong, honorable men. The media and society telling us that being a strong man is no longer necessary or that it's somehow inherently wrong is simply a lie. And many young men succumb to these ideologies and it's not even their fault. It's just how they're brought up, what they're brought up in the environment that they're in, what media and society is telling them. And many times the lack of a father figure or a male influence or a mentor. And in the end they wonder why they feel so lost and so broken, why they can't find or keep relationships with women, why they feel this huge void in their life that they just can't seem to fill because they say, damn, I did everything right. Why isn't everything working out for me? Isn't this who I was supposed to be? Isn't this who I was told to be? Isn't this the advice that I was given? So men, and young men especially need guidance, they need mentorship. And all it takes in this crazy information overload age for a young man to get confused as a 60 second video on TikTok about how he shouldn't.
[00:18:26] Speaker A: Have to pay for dates.
[00:18:27] Speaker B: And this information is coming in at rapid fire these days. One binge on short form video has the power to change someone's entire ideology. Everything that they think or believe about Life and their sense of identity. Because this information is coming in so fast and in such a overload. One second it's a conspiracy theory about how we're all about to die. The next second it's that masculinity is toxic. The next second it's a funny video of a guy falling off a ladder. The next second it's bad dating advice given by a 20 year old. And the next second, oh, by the way, maybe you're actually a girl. It's like Mind Poison curated just for you. Limit your use of it. But dude, if you're here seeking this information, if you're here listening to the Warrior Kings podcast, then I know that you know deep down that there is more for you in this life as a man. And in seeking that, in looking for that information, you're already on the right track. Learn what it means to be an honorable man. Learn what it means to be a masculine man, a truly masculine man. And accept that deeply. And know that it's okay to be that. That it's who you are, that it's who you're supposed to be, it's who you always were, you just didn't know it. Don't buy the lies that there is something inherently wrong with you just because you're a man. It's simply not true. And know that those people who believe that there is something inherently wrong with men just because they're men and hate men and all that sort of things and hate masculinity just know that they're more lost than anybody else. And they're not the majority, they're just the loudest. Strong men are needed in this world right now. We're at the literal tipping point. In so many ways, we need strong men. And these are very dark times that we are living in. But they don't have to be. We got to get back to making sense again. So keep at it. Dive into it. Get into the literature. Listen to the podcast. Watch the videos. Be discerning about who you're getting your advice from. Because there are so many guys out there teaching and preaching a false masculinity, one that's all about disrespecting women and money and cars and bull and all that kind of nonsense. Seek true masculinity and what that means and how to be a strong, honorable, righteous man. I know from experience that in doing this, everything about your life will transform. I have an older episode called the War on Masculin, embracing the primal, wild self. If you want to go further and expand on what True masculinity is and why we're so lost as men these days and how to be okay with being a man, being a manly man, being a strong man. Because I believe deeply that embracing that warrior spirit, that primal, wild self that's in all of us as men is critical to living a fulfilled, super awesome life as a man. And like I said, we got to get back to making sense again in this world. Strong men are needed now more than ever. And you're one of them. Don't ever let anybody take that away from you are powerful. You are a conqueror. You are the king of your kingdom. And guess what, bro? It's time to rise.
[00:21:12] Speaker A: So thank you guys so much for watching and listening today. I hope that you got something out of this. I hope that you learned something. I hope that I have inspired you in some way. Because that's my mission, to reach men all over the world. And apparently I'm doing that, which is super awesome to see those numbers go up all over the world. But it is my mission to teach men all over the world to level up every aspect of their lives as leaders, fathers, husbands, and overall, just awesome dudes. So if that's something they're into, if you got something out of this, definitely subscribe, stick around. Tons of valuable content on the way. Tons of valuable content that I've already produced. If you want to go back and listen to some of the past episodes, lots of topics covered. We just passed our 40th episode. I believe this is episode 41. So we've come a long way in the last few months. Super happy to be seeing this thing grow. And yeah, guys, we're in this together. It's only up from here. We're getting better and better every day. I love you, I'm proud of you, and you're going to do great things in this life, dude. Don't give up. Never give up. Never stop striving. Never stop pushing forward. Get out there and crush it. Thank you, guys. Bye. And if you've got an extra minute, check out this preview from the last episode of the Warrior Kings podcast from a place of a lack of wisdom. Because you would think that they would agree that we should be warning men not to marry the wrong woman for the wrong reasons. But instead they came to the conclusion that all women are evil and I'm.
[00:22:25] Speaker B: Some sort of idiot.
[00:22:26] Speaker A: There's a lot of stupid in the world. That's all I can say. But hey, maybe marriage isn't your thing thing. And you still want a good lady in your life.
[00:22:33] Speaker B: This episode is also for you, so.
[00:22:35] Speaker A: Let'S dive into it now. Listen, I know some of you are jaded and in some cases brainwashed and you believe that there are no good women left in the world. And in a lot of ways I don't blame you. This is a result of the post man hating feminism culture that we're living in. And a lot of you might recoil when I say that and say post man hating feminism.
[00:22:53] Speaker B: But I do believe that we are.
[00:22:55] Speaker A: Moving into an era of the backlash. And this is very evident now in places like Tik Tok, where young women are expressing their longing for more traditional ways with long rants about their disdain for modern dynamics and their desire to be able to embrace their femininity and their desire to be able to embrace traditional marriages and relationships. Creators like Victoria lit are advocating for traditional relationship and traditional marriage dynamics and are very blunt and open with expressing this and incredibly inspiring because they speak so elegantly and openly about these things with comment sections packed full of backlash.
[00:23:31] Speaker B: Backlash.
[00:23:31] Speaker A: The trad wife thing on social media, while more of an aesthetic, shows young women expressing their femininity through short form videos of their more traditional ways of life, which I find very interesting that women being women is now an obscure genre on social media. And you can see this backlash with men as well, with the seeking of masculinity and masculine wisdom and the question that's becoming more and more common, what does it mean to be a man? What does it mean to have value for ourselves as manly men and the seeking of acceptance of being a man when we were told that all things things masculine were wrong? Over the past few years, young men have been getting more and more manly. And I come from an era not too long ago in the 2000s and 2010s, when young men were getting more and more feminine. From an era where all things masculine were wrong, where all things traditional were wrong, and all men were disgusting and evil, dating became more and more dangerous for young men. Dating in general is almost impossible for young men these days. When I was young, I had more girlfriends than I can list now. They say that men in their 20s have had maybe one girlfriend, one relationship in their life, which branches out into all of these conclusions and ideologies in these sub genres online that come to the conclusion that all women just must be evil. Very confusing in dark times we live in. It could very well seem, if you are willing to submit to the lies of this modern culture, that good women no longer exist. But that is a lie. And in this backlash to the lies that we've been fed. I do believe that we will see love prevail.
