Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Did you know that children are more likely to adopt behaviors from their parents more than anyone else? Today were going to get into the importance of a present father and your role as a father to ensure your childrens future success in life. Hello and welcome to the Warrior Kings podcast. Im your host Michael Riggs here to assist you on your journey to unlocking masculinity, manliness and the warrior spirit within and overall leveling up your life. So again, welcome. Welcome to the Warrior Kings podcast. Im pretty sure that I tore a stomach muscle today and that really, really sucks. I was doing one of those ab roller ab wheel things and I'm pretty sure I tore something. I was just trying to get a quick workout in but yeah, I'm gonna have a short with that taking place up on the YouTube channel. So head on over there and subscribe if you're new here. My name is Michael Riggs. I'm a full time author, artist and entrepreneur, husband and father of five, and I say all of the things that most men don't want to hear. So if that's not your thing, definitely don't subscribe to this podcast or YouTube channel. But hey, if it is, if you want to level up every aspect of your life as a man, definitely stick around. Subscribe to this podcast, subscribe to this channel channel. It's good to have you here today. It's good to talk to you today. And it's good to have you as part of this warrior Kings community. The title of today's message is warrior father. And we're going to get into just that. Becoming the best dads that we can be. And you know, some of you might not think that your job as a dad is very important. A lot of dads don't. Your job is to feed them and keep them safe and alive, right? And that's pretty much all it comes down to. And most dads hardly care about being dads at all. But I want you to know today that your role as a father is critically important to every aspect of your childrens lives. For example, a study published online in 2021 on the National Library of Medicine. And im going to read this to you here really quick. And this is from the study. The quantity of father involvement significantly reduced the amount of sons illicit drug and tobacco use across the twenties. Tobacco use across the twenties was associated with a lower cortisol intercept level upon awakening. Although the mediating path was not significant, the present study provided empirical evidence demonstrating long term physiological and behavioral consequences of father involvement in children and its potency as a crucial early caregiving environment for sons, end quote. In other words, simply by you being there, being involved and setting a healthy example equals your child being healthy and successful later in life. And you might ask yourself, or you might ask me, Michael, what is cortisol? This study found that later in life, those guys who had fathers around had lower cortisol levels upon waking. And cortisol is the stress hormone. Too much cortisol causes a whole host of health issues. And most of the time when you see dudes with that big belly, they have high cortisol levels. That's another consequence of that, is it puts a lot of weight in the midsection. But high levels of cortisol mean high stress. So to put it simply, because they had a dad who was present when they were younger, they were producing less of the stress hormone cortisol later in life and were able to deal with and manage stress more effectively. It's also interesting to me that several studies have shown that children, boys and girls who had fathers present early in life or through their adolescent years, were less likely to engage in, indulge in self destructive behavior and substance abuse and things like that. And this excerpt comes from the fatherhoodproject.org dot. And I'm going to read that to you right now. Findings from the rapidly growing science of early childhood and brain development show that a father's active participation and emotional engagement with his children leads to improved social, emotional, behavioral, and academic outcomes. The research confirms that a father's emotional engagement, not the amount of time a father spends with his children, rather, how they interact with them, leads to multiple positive outcomes and serves as a significant factor against high risk behaviors in both girls and boys, end quote. And that's not just any dad, guys. There are a lot of dads in the world who are very present, but also pieces of, to put it plainly, to put it simply for you to be very blunt about it, there are a lot of bad dads out there. So you can't just be there and let that be enough. And with that being said, I will say you being there is massively, massively important, is you are taking just such a huge step in the right direction because so many men are not there for their kids. But you have to be actively engaged in being a good father, and you have to be intentional about it. You might have heard it said before that the best thing a man can do for his children is to show them how much he loves their mother. And if you haven't heard that before, now you have. That's a common thing that people say, and that's very true, but it also applies to every other aspect of life. The best thing that a father can do for his children's health is to show them how healthy he lives. The best thing a father can do for his children's stress management and anger is to show them how well he handles stress and anger. The best thing a father can do for his children's success in life is to show them what success looks like, you know, et cetera. You have to be the example. You understand what I'm saying? Who a person becomes is massively based on who they were around the most when they were children and teens, by the people they were around the most. And the traits that you want to see in them need to be displayed to them by the way that you live. My oldest sons are four and two right now, and I've started to notice them mimicking my behaviors. And this has been very profound for me, especially in my exploration of this subject and the reading of these studies. And I'm gonna play a clip for you right now. And this is when we were finishing up dinner as a family. Check it out. Roll the tape. Thank you for dinner, my love.
[00:05:35] You're welcome for dinner, my love. Thank you for dinner, my love. But for real, though. So if you didn't catch that, I said, thank you for dinner, my love. And my two sons repeated that after me to their mother. Thank you for dinner, my love. One of them has a stutter, but I love it. It's so cute. We have a lot of fun, but I do that every day. I thank their mother for dinner every day. And by me doing that, I am the example. I kiss their mother on the cheek and I thank her for dinner. So likely when they grow up and they've seen that, and that's been the example. That's the norm of what a husband does with a wife after she makes him dinner. Likely they will grow up and do the same thing. And by me loving her in that way and setting that example, they will know the right way to love a woman and treat a woman and to appreciate her and to thank her for the things that she does and to respect her. Right now, if I had been criticizing her the whole dinner, grumbling, complaining about the food, complaining about how bad my day was arguing with her, you know, any example of negative things that happen at dinner tables, if I never showed any gratitude or love towards my wife, likely they would grow up and display those same behaviors. Like I said, kids are more likely to adopt behaviors from their parents more than anyone else. That is their main example. They look up to you. They say, this is how a person acts. This is how a grown up person acts. This is what's normal. That is, their most normal thing is the home that they grow up in and the people that they are around the most, which most of the time is their parents and their siblings. And as far as the importance of the presence of a father, I'm going to read you some crazy statistics from worldmetrics.org. listen up. 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes. Children from father absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor. Children living with a single mother are 14 times more likely to suffer abuse. Teens from fatherless homes are more likely to be involved in delinquent behaviors. Children without fathers in their lives are more likely to drop out of school. 85% of children who exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes. 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. Adolescent girls raised in father absent homes are more likely to engage in early sexual activity and have children outside of marriage. Children from fatherless homes have higher rates of incarceration. I don't know about you, bro, but I don't want my kids in jail. Let's move on. Kids living in single parent homes are at a higher risk for drug and alcohol abuse. Children without fathers are more likely to suffer emotional and psychological problems. Fatherless children are more likely to experience greater difficulties in relationships with their own children. Thanks for sticking with me through that. But that's pretty eye opening, right? Like, whoa, dude, you're pretty important, aren't you? I would also like to point out to you the importance of the fact that you are raising a future grown person who will be a part of the world someday. They are the future. My philosophy on parenting boys is very simple. Ask yourself, am I raising a strong man or am I raising a good little boy? And I'm not saying don't let them be kids. My kids do all of the fun kid things, too. And we wrestle and play and snuggle. And I'm a huge believer in kids being kids and having a good childhood. But what I mean by that, that am I raising a strong man or a good little boy, is that I consider that when I'm teaching them about life, and I consider that, especially by my leading by example, and if you buck up against these concepts and against these studies, because you grew up without a dad and your experience was mostly positive. Guess what? It ain't positive for most people. These things are very real. Take me, for example. My dad was gone most of my childhood and in my teen years, and in my teen and young adult years, I was an absolute nightmare. Bro, you have no idea. I wouldn't even know where to begin. We would be talking for the next ten years if I tried to explain to you how much of a nightmare I was back then, so I know it's true. Luckily, I made it out alive and someday learned to level up my own life and get my sh t together. Unfortunately, it doesn't work out like that for a lot of people. And I would also like to add here really quick that I have a positive relationship with my dad these days. So I didn't want that to sound like an attack or anything. It's just a fact. He's a veteran in the army who served for many, many years. He was an officer. He's a multi degree black belt in martial arts. Super awesome guy. You know, life just happens sometimes, so I'm not attacking him in any way, but let's move on here. So what are some ways that you can lead your children and be a good father for them? And a good example, as I mentioned before, show them how much you love their mother. Engage in physical activity and exercise and make healthy choices both in diet and behavior. Show them love and understanding. Show them how to be patient and how to handle stress well. Show them how to react when negative things happen. Show them your strength. Show them that you are a protector. Be honest and consistent with your words and your actions. Treat everyone with kindness and respect, including your children and their mother. Demonstrate responsibility. Handle your obligations with diligence and accountability. Practice self discipline. Exhibit control over your emotions, your habits, and your decisions. Encourage learning. Value education. Pursue personal growth in every aspect of your life that will be an example to them. Exhibit compassion. Show empathy and care for others. Teaching the importance of helping those in need. Generosity. Cultivate and maintain strong and positive relationships with friends and family. Display your strong work ethic and your commitment to your goals and dreams. That one is critically important, especially if you want them to be successful in life. Show them what success looks like. Spend quality time with your children. Show them that they are a priority in your life. Dude, this isn't just the world and they're your kids and you're their dad and we're all just floating through life. No. They are the future of this world. You are a warrior king and they are your heirs. Realize the great responsibility and blessing that you have been given and get to work. I would love to hear your thoughts on this and your experience with fathering or being fathered or having the lack of a father in your life. Share that in the comments. If you're on the YouTube version or head over there to the YouTube version, I would love to hear from you and how this episode impacted your life or inspired you in some way. Or if you just want to offer some encouraging words to all of the fathers that are out there, all the fathers that are out there really doing it. If you want to offer some encouragement to them and support each other, drop those comments on there as well. Let's get some conversation going around this. Don't be afraid to be the first person to comment either. Somebody's got to do it. Have some balls. I know it takes a lot for us dudes to step out and say something and have a conversation about something real. But if you guys do that, you step out and start having a conversation on there. You share your experience with fathering, fatherhood, your experience with your father, all that sort of stuff. We all commend you for that, man. It's super awesome. And I'm going to put a link down in the description of this podcast episode. If you're not on the YouTube version, that will take you over to the YouTube channel where you can subscribe. We're really trying to get that YouTube channel kicked off. Like I said in, in the last episode, the podcast is blowing up on all the audio platforms, but the YouTube channel hasn't really taken off yet. So I really appreciate you guys going over there and subscribing and getting engaged with the content. It means a lot to me. Thank you so much for watching and listening today. I hope you got something out of this. I hope it inspired you in some way to level up your fatherhood, to know that you are important as a father. You have one of the most important jobs in the world, bro. If you have kids, if you have kids on the way, you have been given the greatest responsibility in the world to raise the next future generation of people that are going to be on this planet. I don't know if you noticed lately, but the people here have been sucking lately. So you have the opportunity to turn it around, to make your children successful, to make your children good people. You have that opportunity right now to be a good father and a good dad. And I respect you and commend you for that. For even listening to this, seeking this information about how to be a good dad, how to be a good father, all of that. Dude, you are just. Man, I can't even tell you how much I respect you for that. So thank you so much for being here today, and I'll catch you guys on the next one. Thanks, guys. Bye.
